reaching perfection

So this exploration of vegetarianism has now permeated every part of my life. Which is really quite amazing. So here is the thing, I told you I decided to become vegetarian permanently because when I really think about what i am actually eating, when i really think about what it means to drink a glass of milk, when i think about the things that are going on in the world that makes these things possible, i feel uncomfortable. it is something i do not want to be part of my life. i do not want to have to ignore the pain and death caused by our food system multiple times a day when i eat. i want to fully realize things, i want to truly understand, fully feel, i don't want to have to ignore the truth in any aspect of my life.

because i want to reach higher consciousness. i want to progress.

i think if you're shutting yourself down like that, when you're ignoring something so horrific, you are limiting yourself.

so now, in my whole life i have been figuring out that i need to align my entire life up with my conscience, i need to stop ignoring things, i need to stop doing things that i do not feel is right,

for my own good

so i can progress.



another way that this change in diet has changed me ...

i suppose that in my former thinking i was constantly trying to revert to a more natural way of living. i thought that natural was best... i don't really know what the basis of this feeling was.... perhaps its based in a kind of spiritual mindset, like... we were made to be this certain way, so it is the best way...

but through this change i have been thinking...

i mean i know a vegan diet isn't really natural. i know that our bodies need B12 and it isn't easily accessible in anything vegan. i know that i am living in a way that just is... unnatural.
so it goes against my old feelings of natural being best..
so why did i decide that something 'unnatural' is something i need to do? why is that okay for me now?

well... its progress...
shouldn't the human race progress?
shouldn't we strive to be the best we can be?

so from an evolutionary view point i could say that the human race has evolved these things called souls and brains and they are the cause of this natural compassion for other beings... so... isn't it natural to do what our evolved bodies, our evolved brains and souls tell us to do? natural isn't necessarily the way we have always been....


i have been reading Jonathan Livingston Seagull and it applies in so many ways to my thinking...

like...

so the book is about this seagull and it wants to progress, it strives to reach perfection ( instead of merely sustain itself). it wants to fly perfectly
so there is this part where its trying to fly extremely fast, but its wings are too long, and he thinks that perhaps he shouldn't try to fly any faster, he shouldn't try to reach perfection because his body isn't made for it. it isn't natural for him to fly so well.
but then he realizes that if he alters his body, if he changes his wings by tucking them in like a falcon he can reach his goals, he can get closer to perfection....

so if we have to do things that seem unnatural to progress....
(it really isn't unnatural, is it? because our minds, our natural minds are moving us forward)
the way to perfection, the way to higher consciousness requires change... it requires us to do things that no human has done before....

crazy.
what great art this has been.